From Salem to Sequenom, Following the Whack'o Witch Hunting Trail

To all yea' hunters of the supernatural (be it of generic computer abstraction-ism or un-natural genetic phenomenon),
Happy Halloween!

As is well known, there are certain things that should never have been allowed to be in the first place.

Patenting of unfathomable software magic is one of them.

Monopolizing of DNA prestidigitation (no matter how remarkable) is another.

Our hunters of the judicial exceptionalisms are vigilantly on the war path lest some crafty scrivener weave the devil's satanic verses into some obtuse patent claim language. It is imperative to unmask all claims by stripping away their conventional coverings so as to behold the truth of what they are truly "directed to." Only if divine intervention reveals something "significantly more" can they be saved from the gallows. All witches and all claimers of witchcraft must hang.

No need, course; to belabor the brilliant and self-elevating boastful brains of our vigilante judicials with technical details. All code is no more than that witch any 2nd year engineer student will finish before weekend's last dusking. And fishing out pathological genetic code from DNA strand tis no more than a pluck of leaf off yonder tree. Neither deserves chance to prove otherwise. Those who dare question our Blunderland framework of exceptionalism detectionism are but apostates and blasphemers. Hang them all. Happy Happy is our Halloween.

Subject to ... legislative whims of judges gone wild

Actually, the statute 35 USC Section 101 ends with “subject to the conditions and requirements of this title.”
But one would never know that in reading from the latest of the firestorm ignited by Bilski, Alice and Mayo.

Real legislation takes years to perfect. Debates and hearings are held over the years. Experts are consulted. Affected parties are listened to. Amendments are proposed and adopted or not after further debate. Those responsible understand that new legislation can impact the lives of millions of people. They do not lightly tread into passage of new laws.

Not so in the judicial branch.
New laws can be promulgated without notice or hearings. They can be based on the arbitrary and capricious whims of the judiciary and on the ignorance and arrogance of same with respect various matters of complex feed waters and socioeconomic ecological systems.

So what if it takes the best and the brightest of our students years of post-graduate study to understand subtle facets of molecular biology and computer engineering? Our uber-super judiciary can come to grips with the same subject matter in just a few hours. Isolating a medicinally relevant gene sequence? Why that is the same as hiking through the jungle, spotting a banana tree ripe with fruit and plucking off one of the bananas. Mere child's play.

Configuring a complex computer system to operate correctly? That too is mere child's play. Just walk into any ole' coffee shop and grab hold of any 2nd year engineering student. One weekend is more than enough time to "code" it up. Simple as grandma's apple pie and King Tut's accounting system. Why all the fuss?

Have no fear. Uber judges are here.

Creepy Clowns Lurking in the Fed

Another creepy clown has been spotted, this time at the Fed. Cir. (to complement our old friend, Clarence the SCOTUS Clown):
www.ipwatchdog.com/judge-mayer-should-step-down

Patents that incentivize broader communication actually chill free speech? Really?

Let's put on our clown thinker caps, step back a bit, and ponder on that.

Before there was the telegraph.
(Thank you Samuel F. Morse.)
Before there was the telephone.
(Thank you Alexander G. Bell --or Elisha Gray?)
Before there were emails via Internet and cell phone.
(Thank you unappreciated many others.)
One had to rely on snail mail (rush shipped by pony express).
Or face to face, if perchance such meeting ever happened.

Then a bunch of miracles happened.
Inventors.
Inventions.
Long distance real time communications!
All spurred by patents.

But Creepy Clown No. 1 at the Fed wants you to believe the opposite.
That inventions "directed to" improving communications should NOT be patent eligible.

'Cause you see, cause ipso logistico absurdum, patents that incentivize improving real time collaborative communications stifle at least one clown's First Amendment rights to fool everyone else!

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Post Scripts:

"This is not entirely a nation of clowns, though it feels like that lately." --Kunstler
Speak for yourself, James. Speak for yourself. From this corner, yes it is.

Patent Docs opines on IV v. Symatec here
"In terms of determining what is conventional, it seems that the Court can characterize the claims in a way to achieve a desired outcome."

"Judge Mayer’s concurrence is worth reading in full because he delves into the political and philosophical arguments that are behind every patent-eligibility decision, but that are often not openly discussed." --swip_report

The Reason You’re Afraid Of Clowns