Saturday, November 15, 2014

Salem Witch Hunts in a Post-Technological World

Struggle Struggle.
Troll and Bungle.
Slowly the Ouija cauldron churns.

"Oh Great Ouija, Oh conduit to the spirit world,
couple us wilt though to the spirit of the great and powerful J Giles Rich"

"Is that you for real Giles?
Do you see the auras emanating from this here patent claim?

Oh pray tell us ghostly Giles,
Is it abstract or even more abstract?
Or perchance
Is there something ... something more?
Something so significantly more ...
that it makes one wish to pass mustard?"

"We are so lost Giles,
since Alice has gone off to Blunderland.
These Ultra-Myrtles give us ultra migraines."

"How are we to divine the direction of each claim?
Oh it bee-ith so TECH-NO-NO Logical
and yet anciently conventional at the same time.
What should we do oh spirit of the Great Giles?
What should we do?"

"What's that oh apparition?
You prefer geriatrically generic catchup?
Not mustard?

So, all kidding aside,
and tongue withdrawn from Shakespearean cheek,
we have moved into a post-technological era
in which geriatric judges who knoweth not even how to use the emails
have come to conclude that they know what them there Internets are all about.

They know an "abstractly directed" patent claim when they see one.
They know when the crafty patent practitioner drafstmen have failed to give them something of greater significance and "preciseness" (the new catch word of Ultramercial).

Better watch out this XMAS holiday season, they even know when you have been bad or very very judge-bribing bad.
To be ... as usual ... continued (some day)

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